Let bells peal loud across this nation,
To greet the latest Royal gestation.
From noble seed this lovely pair,
Have bestowed on us the future heir.
Forget the banks and clear your diary,
Discreetly bin the Levenson Enquiry.
Across the house they all unite,
To fill our heads with puerile shite.
The Throne secured across the ages,
To fill the Mail for fourteen pages.
Spirits raised our dreams you carry,
Unless it looks like dear Prince Harry.
A boy, a girl the housewives guess,
Though not born via the NHS.
Cut benefits and tax the needy,
For private staff with tastes too greedy
I’m skint so cut down on the bills,
Eat processed food, neck vitamin pills.
Though told we all will share the pain,
No hungry nights for those who reign.
The Royal Wedding to the Jubilee,
We doffed our caps n bent the knee,
But clearly its still not enough,
So now he’s got her up the duff.
The BBC cancelling all staff leave,
For coverage I can’t believe.
The capitalists like bees to honey,
Will hammer this to make more money.
Get used to hourly speculation,
Loudly scorn our agitation.
Cos once again our cash they’ve plucked,
So now I fear we’re Royally fucked.